Titus 2 (Part 3) God’s Design for Women in the Church

Titus 2:3-5

“Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.”

As we continue to focus on Titus 2, keep in mind the instructions Paul gives Titus in the whole chapter. We are to live out these instructions “so that the word of God may not be reviled” and to “adorn the gospel”. How we live out our faith is significant! God calls us to demonstrate the grace of the gospel as we live our our womanhood. See Part 1 of this series for more details.

The third instruction Paul give to women is to be sober.

3.Not slaves to too much wine.

The word Paul uses “slaves” means “to be held and controlled against one’s will” - it’s the idea that a person may start off drinking wine to feel in control of their circumstances - the idea that “i’ll just take the edge off a hard day, or I’ll stop feeling so anxious about the day” turns into being totally out of control and being enslaved. The wine begins to control the woman rather than she being able to choose to trust God. 

This is probably a bigger issue than some of you think it is within the church. In the secret place of our homes, being enslaved to wine is a problem. We see the public face of people when we are out and about, but who we are at home is who we really are before God.

We want to keep our hearts in mind. The desires of our hearts and why we do what we do matters. When I’ve counseled women I have had women argue the difference between tipsy and drunk. This reveals the heart attitude. The idea of “I can get as close to sin as possible without crossing the line” is a very different heart posture of “I want to please God as much as possible!” God’s word doesn’t say all wine consumption is wrong, but it warn against using it too much. 

"And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit" (Eph 5:18 ESV) If our lives are enslaved to any substance - we cannot be filled with the Holy Spirit. 

When we turn to alcohol or other substances for comfort or to alleviate anxiety or to relax after a hard day, we are placing our hope in that substance to help us, not Christ. Finding our refuge in anything other than Christ is a false place to find refuge. This is another area where a believer could sully the honor of God and the gospel. 

Next, older women are to “teach what is good” to younger women.

4.Teach what is good

Let’s start by defining “good”. 

Good is defined by God. In fact, Scripture calls God the very definition of good. “Psalm 119:68 You are good, and You do what is good”

We need to separate out our opinion or even “what works” from what God describes as good. This is linked to the Proverbs 31 idea of “she opens her mouth with wisdom”.

God defines good in Romans 12:2

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

God’s will is what is “good, acceptable and perfect”. So teaching good, is teaching, modeling, demonstrating, living out God’s will revealed in His Word!

Consider what words come out of your mouth (and what you model in your living). Are you focused on communicating God’s truth, or are you communicating information from other sources? Are you quick to give “help” from an influencer, WebMD, the latest fad diet or health tip, or a news source?

Speaking God’s good and acceptable and perfect will is so desperately needed. We are bombarded with opinions and “expert advice”. Sometimes we are just quick to share “this is what works for me”. There may be times to share some helpful tips, but that is not the same as sharing the wisdom of God. Pragmatism, the idea that outcome determines what is right - “the end justifies the means” is a popular way of thinking. This is not biblical thinking. God does care about the means - the motive, the intention, the way that we go about things. We need to do everything to honor and glorify Him.

Let’s grow to be women who think FIRST about God.

Teaching what is good is about passing down wisdom from God. God doesn’t always encourage us to find a quick fix. God works through times of suffering and struggles. Sometimes a “quick fix” is NOT a godly response. Are you pointing younger women towards God’s character and His perspective on suffering?

God cares about us learning to trust Him and His character and promises MORE than that we experience relief and comfort. 

Older women are literally to be “teachers of what is good”. This is not a formal class. This is not the idea that every older woman needs to hold seminars or write a book. Being a teacher of what is good is modeling, discipling, mentoring, and setting an example of living a godly life in the home.  A training process implies relationship, an ongoing relationship and responsibility that includes confrontation and affirmation. When we take the time to get to know someone in a relationship and spend time with them, we can speak with wisdom into their situation. It may involve confrontation over sin and most definitely should include encouragement and affirmation of what is godly. 

Rather than being a formal class, older women are encouraged to live life among younger women and demonstrate what godly living looks like. We get caught up in the American church about having the same age groups together all the time. God’s word calls us to mix it up and have older women know and teach younger women. This is God’s design!

There is a prohibition of women teaching or having authority over men in the church. 1 Timothy 2:12-14  says, “I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet. For Adam was formed first, then Eve; and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.” - 

Women are not to instruct men in scripture and we talked briefly about this verse in week one where it points back to God’s creation order and the way that Adam and Eve sinned differently. But here in Titus 2, women are told to teach women. We do have a responsibility to teach - younger women. Pastors and men in general can’t model living as a godly woman. That’s our responsibility!

Sadly, many women have not had moms that have shown them how to be godly wives, mothers, or women. The church needs you to take this on! You can only really model this when you have them at your house or go to their house. 

As we get into the rest of the list of what is taught and trained, these are the “good” things.